Living life fully

Well, today is the 3rd anniversary of Kyle passing away. My dear friends checked in with me and made sure I was doing okay. I am doing surprisingly well. Like I said to them, "I think of Kyle multiple times a day, everyday. Today I will think of him more, but it's not like he is ever out of my mind." It's not that I cry every time I think of him. More likely it's thinking of him doing something funny, or knowing what he would be saying at a particular moment.

Kyle had a gift of pointing out just how disgusted he was with ferry traffic (because you know how bad it gets on Bainbridge Island), my not choosing his choice of dining establishments, or my wanting listen to something other than his choice of music.

One other gift I feel Kyle had was to live life large. There was no sitting on the edges and just watching for him. He was always quick to join in and have fun. I put this photo in because 1.) It was taken right before he passed away, and 2.) He just had so much fun being part of the group who got to bounce the big red ball. He was seen many a time in his early years dancing at the free concerts at Waterfront Park, joining in with buskers at the Pike Place Market and Seattle Center, trying to hog the stage during the skits at his 4th grade class camp, or getting on stage at a concert we had in our backyard and air drumming with markers. Let's face it, if there was a show to steal, he would steal it. Not intentionally, but just with enthusiasm for life.

How many fun opportunities have you missed out on because you were afraid of what people would think? I would like to think that Kyle inherited some of my spontaneous nature, but I think in reality, it was me who learned from him. This life is not a dress rehearsal,THIS IS IT. Take every opportunity to have fun. Laugh, and tell the people who are special to you, that you love them.

Remembering Kyle

It's been close to a year since Kyle passed away. In that year it's been a year of firsts. The first start of school without him, the first birthday, the first Christmas. Ugh.

It has also been a year of things I've never thought I'd be doing. Creating his website, writing a blog and planning a lasting tribute. Those of you who know me well, know I don't like meetings. But, for the last year, I've been a part of the Sakai Arts & Traditions Committee and attending meetings. As part of this group, I've helped in making Kyle's Marimba, an art installation at his school, a reality. I am so excited it's all coming together. Next week ground prep starts and on the 16th of February it is installation day. 

It's only fitting that his memorial is a musical instrument. Kyle has been drawn to music from an early age. As a toddler he loved to clap rhythms and play his Barney banjo that he got from Aunt Julie and Uncle Pip (he couldn't quite pronounce Chip). God, I can still hear that banjo. It had a laser light where the strings would be, and if the light was interrupted the music would play. Later on it was the snare drum I bought at a garage sale. Boy, the neighbors loved that. The acoustic guitars, the electric one, and the drum sets. He drummed so often it was even part of his grade school conference to try and stifle his drumming during class with pencils and even his hands. When Kyle was older it was all about his ipod. It was the first thing he grabbed when his eyes opened. And let's not forget his air guitar and rock star moves which were finely crafted by watching his Big and Rich concert on the dvr over and over. About three years ago we had a concert in our backyard. The other kids were running around and playing, not listening to the music. Kyle inevitably found his way on stage, front and center, with a marker in his hand which doubled as a microphone. Then he just sat down, still on stage, still in front, and drummed with the markers. 

Are you wondering why Kyle is in his boxer briefs in the photo? This was taken at Seattle Center after a day at the Science Center and a romp in the big fountain. We were not prepared enough to bring swimming suits, so Mitch and Kyle stripped down to underwear and had fun. I saved the dry clothes for the ferry ride home. On the way to the car we stopped and listened to this bongo band. Kyle was rocking to the groove so enthusiastically that they invited him to play. That kind of stuff was always happening to him. He was a lucky guy.

I'll let you know more about Kyle's Marimba and the details of the dedication ceremony a bit later. It would be cool if you could be there. 

A DAY WITH MY BOYS

I love music. Both my kids love music. (My husband loves music, but thinks no decent music was made after his high school days.) I love going to see my favorite bands, and look for opportunities to expose my kids to good music. Like last summer, the boys and I headed out for our Bumbershoot adventure. We braved the crowds, we ate our favorite foods. This year was grilled hotdogs for the boys, Thai curry for me, and a brick (literally) of shoestring fries.

The highlight for Mitch was to go see The Flobots, but what we didn’t expect, since I had never followed their music, was that 10,000 other people had the same idea. For Kyle and I it was the Old 97s. They have a song called “King of All the World” that used to be Mitch’s favorite song, then Kyle played it so much we all got sick of it, which was the case with most of Kyle’s music. They were great. Kyle loves watching bands, and inevitably he would start drumming along and nodding his head to the beat. Everytime they would finish a song and people were clapping, Kyle would scream out, “King o’ Word”. In the end, they played all the favorites, but not that one song. Kyle was disgusted, stomped his foot, raised his hand palm up, and kept on saying, “Mom, why no King o’ Word?”

Even though Kyle didn’t get to hear his song, I knew from his swagger that day (the one you saw when he walked down the halls or when you saw him on the street) that he really did feel like the king of all the world.